What Do I Do With My Frustration???

My list of items to do today consists of mainly computer work I have been procrastinating on. I normally don't procrastinate on things unless I have a reason to do so. To summarize my reason for procrastinating on my computer work:  I don't totally understand what I need to do to get where I want to go!

So, I find other things to do: housework, eating my next meal or making a phone call. But none of those things are going to get me closer to my goal of finishing my computer work. I still have this looming, dark cloud of a task hanging over my head. If I want to finish it - and I do - there is only one way to get through it, and that's through it.

I need to accomplish several things here in my mind, before I can accomplish anything…

1. I need an attitude adjustment, for sure! I need to see the computer work as a learning opportunity which will springboard me to higher levels of education and capability to succeed in my chosen field.

2. I need patience to sit at my computer and use trial and error in addition to searching different websites to see how my issues have been resolved by others.

3. I need to find a way to lower my level of frustration.

Perhaps #1 and #3 go together. Perhaps if I change my attitude, my frustration will decrease, and if I am able to decrease my frustration, my attitude will improve. Or, perhaps I just need to plug along at #2 and forget #1 and #3. If I plug along at #2, then wind up resolving the issues with my computer, then I know my attitude will be great and my frustration will disappear!

But what can I do with frustration, anyway? How do you deal with frustration? I believe if we can find ways to attack all three issues, above, we would be a lot better off than just dealing with one. However, the frustration seems to be the most baffling for me!

The Holidays: License To Eat?

In a conversation a few weeks ago, a woman with a handful of christmas cookies said to me, "I don't care what I eat until January 1st!" Although she has been overweight for the 4 years I have known her, she claims that she is a vegetarian and that diet "works for her", and that she will resume with that after the first of the year. I wonder what "works" means, given that she is no smaller than she was 4 years ago?

What really struck me about this conversation was her conflicted messages. On one hand, not caring about what one eats for the next few weeks implies a lack of conscientiousness and a lack of control. On the other hand, claiming one is a vegetarian implies a heightened conscientiousness regarding one's food choices. I wonder which one she really is? I wonder if she realizes how conflicted her sentences sound? Or, is this just me?

With all the extra activity going on and different foods circulating around the holiday season, my goal over the holidays has never been to lose weight, but to maintain it. For me to place unrealistic goals for myself in the area of "food" and "holiday eating" sets me up for nothing but failure - and a more difficult goal to surmount on January 1st! Conversely, I could isolate, stay at home and not participate in the festivities. Perhaps I might lose weight then, but I know that would not make me happy!

Now, I'm not saying that I can't have a good time without overeating: to the contrary! But if I try my best to maintain my normal eating and exercise schedule over the holidays, I know I will be my happiest. And when I am my happiest, my world seems to be okay.

Drama Queen

A big reason I used to overindulge in anything was because I was all worked-up about something. I was bugged, frustrated or disturbed about something I had no control over. In fact, I would work myself up into a frenzy about something menial, just because I was so used to getting myself all worked-up: the drama became a norm for me and I became comfortable with lots of drama in my life. Conversely, when I had no drama in my life, something felt wrong.

I don't have to live that way anymore. I start my days differently today, with prayer and meditation. When I feel myself beginning to get uptight about something, a red flag goes up and I pause and think for a moment about how I might choose to respond to that situation. In addition, when I know I am approaching a situation where I have been upset before (like holiday traffic), I can say a prayer and repeat affirmations so that my mind stays occupied with positive thoughts. Before I know it, I have successfully circumvented that unpleasant situation!

The act of keeping my mind and emotions on an even keel plays a huge part in my ability to eat moderately. And how about you? What are some ways you are able to maintain sane eating? What are your tools to overcome stressful situations? We can always add another tool in our toolboxes to keep us adequately equipped for the next yucky situation!

Car Trouble: Do I Need Another Excuse To Overeat?

Recently, I had this "ding-ding" alarm going off in my car every now and then. At first, I ignored it (denial would work great if the problems went away!!), then the dinging increased in frequency. I couldn't figure out what the problem was. I looked in the manual, and I searched on the dash for information regarding the car's maintenance schedule. I took the car to the shop and they said there was no ding going off. So I took my car home and the dinging would continue. I took it to the dealership (left it there for several days to wait for them to get to my car), and they said there was no dinging (Murphy's law?), so I took it home. This dinging went on for at least 6 months, and every time it sounded, my adrenaline would spike: "Here's an alarm! Do something! Ding-Ding!" But I didn't know what I was supposed to do!! Help!

Finally, the dinging got so frequent, I once again took it to (another) dealership. I was desperate to have this alarm stopped. Fortunately, the dinging sounded when they test-drove the car. They were able to determine the cause (it was a faulty mechanism in the hatch back, "telling" the car that the hatch was open when, in fact, it was closed), fix it under the warranty, and I was free to go. On the way home, there was no "ding-ding". It was quiet. Amazing. I started to cry with relief! I hadn't realized how stressed out this alarm had made me.

How many times have we overeaten because of some circumstance we had no control over? How many times have we overeaten as a result of a stressful situation? And how many times have we overeaten out of sheer frustration? Too many to count, perhaps? There must be a better way to live.

I can find any excuse to overeat, on any given day. But when my world comes crashing down, I don't even need an excuse. The difficulty lies in my deciding to live differently. I can choose to respond differently to life than I have in the past.

How do you respond differently to life, so that you don't have to overeat anymore?

Holiday "Food For Thought"

How many of us can say we have lost weight, only to put it back on sometime later? Could our struggle with maintaining a healthy weight be more about permanently changing our lifestyles, rather than simply losing weight?

Why are some just blowing off the rest of 2013 when it comes to their food? What drudgery that must be, to endure the rest of the beautiful holiday season, only looking forward to the new year. What are we missing by focusing on the future, rather than living in today? What a waste!

When it comes to our behavior surrounding food, we begin to feel better and gain self-esteem by doing esteem-able acts. Doing esteem-able acts makes us feel good about ourselves. And when we feel good about ourselves, we want to treat ourselves better. When we treat ourselves better, we want to take better care of ourselves. It's a cycle that feeds on itself.

For some of us, food has been a reward, a treat, or a way to "take our comfort". Perhaps the way some of us who see overeating this way may change their thinking. Perhaps this way of eating will come to be a form of punishment, rather than a treat.

Make a decision today, right now, that you will be moderate with your consumption of all foods, even healthy foods. Stay away from those things that make you crave more. Finally, create in your mind a short affirmation, such as, "I am always temperate with my food", and repeat this statement hundreds of times a day. You will find that you will begin to obey that statement without effort and your dreams of being free from the bondage of food will become a reality.

To Vegan Or Not To Vegan?

     I have never felt it was my place to dictate what someone else should eat or not eat - so I don't! True freedom of choice comes from the inside, not the outside. If someone guilt-trips me for eating chicken and beef, I may change for a while and abstain, but unless the motivation comes from within, the change won't be lasting.
     Some say that they feel better when they eat animal foods. Others say they gain weight eating all the carbohydrates in a vegetarian diet with no complete proteins to offset the carbs. Still others like to go vegan for health reasons and/or because they have animal cruelty issues with feed farms.
     There is credible evidence to support the theory that animal proteins (cholesterol) are the culprit in many diseases in the world today. There are books written by doctors, farmers and just regular people like you and me.
     I shudder to think what happens in feed lots, but I am not going to change the hearts of the people who participate in that cruelty by abstaining from animal protein. On the other hand, if more people became aware of the cruel treatment toward these animals, perhaps more laws and regulations would be created. But that still wouldn't change the hearts of cruel people.
     So, I keep my opinions to myself about what I choose to eat and I don't bug anyone about their food choices.